Saturday, June 28, 2008
Entry?? almost forgot that I have this blog for quite sometime. I wasn't able to do the previos things I used to becoz of the sudden changes. I dunno if its really strictly implemented, but I know... somehow. Besides, I'm the only one who has this task for our campaign.
Currently I'm here in the office, doing some stuffs. Attending the needs of the sales people of from US Website Builder Llc. I'm supposed to be home, with my little angel Althea Marie and my papabhe. Haay... anyways i'ts just a matter of choice and I'm here. Got just a day left to rest with my family.
Family matters?? hmm.. doing good so far. Sister Jayzell just recently graduated in her Associate degree (HRM) in college last May. Though I haven't heard from her yet, hopefully she had a nice job already so she can help our parents and our younger siblings. Meanwhile, sister Shiela Mae has already started her educational career this semester. She's currently taking up Computer Secretarial Course there in EICT Cubao.
Kinda hard for all of us to have this schedule in taking care of my baby. But, so far its just fine. She doesn't have a nanny. No one's available to take the position. Hehehe.. really really hard to look for a nanny nowadays. So we have to learn how to sacrifice and manage our time.
Soon, i'll post pictures of my baby. That's all for now.
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Ishel out
@ |1:31 PM|
Saturday, June 07, 2008
9:48pm.. we're currently here in an Internet Cafe just nearby our place. I was just posting few pics of my beloved Althea Marie on her friendster account. And I'll post some here as well... Check it out guys!!
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Ishel out
@ |6:46 AM|
Thursday, December 27, 2007
My Babygirl
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Ishel out
@ |8:15 AM|
Friday, August 17, 2007
"Everything happens for a reason." That's the first thing which came into my mind at this very moment. This day isn't that good. Somehow i can say that i got a badluck today. First and foremost i want to inform everyone that i just got my 2nd and final ultrasound result just this morning. I'd be hypocrite enough if i wont admit to myself that i was kinda dissappointed of the result. I know i shouldn't feel that way. It's still a blessing and an angel given by Above. Everyone knows i really wanted a baby boy. But just this mornin' it was confirmed that this life i bear inside is a baby girl. Yeah! a baby girl..
I shed teardrops in my eyes. Especially when i saw papabhe's initial reaction. I dunno if he was just pretending, trying to piss me off or whatsoever. But he expressed unhappiness when he confirmed that its a she. It hurts me of course. Even im kinda dissappointed, still its our baby! Its the fruit our love. We both want a baby boy. But what can we do? Its God's will, so be it. Ayways i know he was just trying to tease me coz he knew from the start that i was really hoping for a baby boy. There's a history behind it. You know it if you know me or if your close to me. Anyways its not a BIG deal. Im still happy. Her name will be "Althea Marie". In fact we're planning to buy our personal baby's belonging this week-end...
Anyways, the wheather is not fine today. There's 2 typhoons on the go! Its kinda hard for me to go to work every night. But then like others in the call center industry, i have no choice. No excuses as what our company believes and implements. One of the most emabarrasing instance that happened tonight was that, Carlo's tita brought my umbrella. I was pissed off coz i had been texting her for so many times already and got no reply. I told her that she needs to be in the house before 7:30pm (time before i go) coz it was really raining and i need the thing. Yet its seems that she doesn't care. Damn! i hate it.. i left the house with just a coat to protect me. I was walking through the rain coz i got no choice! When i was on my way to Ortigas, near PODIUM.. oh my! guess what had happened. I was stuck! My sandals gave up.. i need to stay in a certain place with the rain, asked one of my verifiers to do me a favor. Gud thing Gracie has an extra slipper which i used tonight in replacement of my damaged sandals. Or else i'd look so damn that time**sigh**. How embarrased i am this 17th day of August.
My birthday is upcoming. I'll be turning 21 this coming 20th of August. Let's wait and see.. meanwhile im still here. In my desk in front of computer, doing nothing but this. Life must go on. Oh! by the way its our 1st year and 8th monthsary today. Its already 18th of the month. I already texted my hubby and greeted him already. That's about it. Its week-end tomorrow. Time to rest and relax. We'll celebrate tonight. That's about it. Back to work guys..
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Ishel out
@ |11:32 AM|
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Here's my latest pix..
This pic was taken at Mcdo with my beloved papabhe..
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Ishel out
@ |9:32 AM|
Friday, July 06, 2007
May, June, July 6th?.. ahaha almost a couple of months has passed after my last entry in here. As usual, a lot of things and instances already happened. Its just an accident visiting this page. Hehehe.. and then again it triggers me to post another entry. Just a short update of what's latest about me.
Well.. everythings already inorder. I mentioned on my last post here that we do have plans of settling down on our own and it already come to life. We are living together in a home sweet home now. That was last 16th of June to be exact. Its in fact a few meters away from my tita and his parents as well. So far so go0d. We do have privacy, away from all those chatters/gossippers around us before. Anyways whatever they say.. " the hell i care!". As long as we're happy together. And of course definitely its none of their damn business.
My angel!!! mmmm... still counting. He turned 6 months recently. Still hoping and wishing that its a baby boy. Hehehe... see my pix here? shheeeesss... big tummy!
And its getting bigger and heavier as days passed by. Ahhhh... making it hard for me to walk a long distance daily. From shaw boulevard station going to Antel Building. But then of course i need to exercise. And gosh i gain 3 kgrms more this month. My doctor informed me to control my diet. Hehehe.. but G0d i can't help it. Sir Runer always reminds me to do same thing as well but it's really hard i say. I know its all up to me. Yeah it is. Huhuhu.. discipline is the answer.
My angel's gender remains hidden. By the end of this month, together with the monthly check up, papabhe & i will go back there to the Laboratory Medical Center to re-undergo ultrasound. Still hoping its a cute little boy.
Well, all i can say is.. "Im happy, and im inlove.."
C yah!
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Ishel out
@ |1:56 PM|
Friday, May 11, 2007
Im on my blogsite again! There's just this story that touch my heart. Reason that droves me in this page. And i wanted to keep this as much as possible. Here it is..
I'll carry you out every morning until we are old...
On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom. This was the scene of ten years ago. The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid; I went into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were steadily increasing; the affections between us seemed to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school. Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.
Dew came into my life. It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was the apartment I bought for her. Dew said, you are the kind of man who best draws girl's eyeballs. Her words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we just married, my wife said, Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls. Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my wife. But I couldn't t help doing so. I moved Dew’s hands aside and said, you go to select some furniture, O.K.? I've got something to do in the company. Obviously she was unhappy, because I had promised her to go and see with her.
At the moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something impossible to me. However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt. Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon. Then we watched TV together. Or, I was lounging
before the computer, visualizing Dew's body. This was the means of my entertainment.
One day I said to her in a slight joking way, suppose we divorce, what will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I couldn’t imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious. When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide something while
talking with her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.
Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more. When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I've got something to tell you, I said. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want to divorce. I raised a serious topic calmly. She didn't seem to be much annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why I'm serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer turned her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! . At that night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew. With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement that stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart the woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one-day. But I could not take back what I had said. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce, which had obsessed me for several weeks, seemed to be firmer and clearer. A late night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her writing something at the table. I fell asleep fast. When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again. She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but I was supposed to give her one
months time before divorce, and in the months time we must live as normal life as possible. Her reason was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she didn't want him to see our marriage was broken.
She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day? This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I nodded and said, I remember. You carried me in your arms, she continued, so, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning. I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage with a romantic form.
I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me feel uncomfortable.
My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when I carried her out for the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, Let us start from today, don't tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for bus, I drove to office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this intimate woman carefully for a long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face.
On the third day, she whispered to me, the outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Dew became vaguer. On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc. I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger.
I didn't tell Dew about this. I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. I said to her, it seems not difficult to carry you now. She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one.Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown fatter. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a sense of pain. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head.
Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it's time to carry mum out. He said. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. She said, actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old. I held her tightly and said; both you and I didn't notice that our life was lack of such intimacy. I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won’t divorce. I'm serious. She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no fever. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I can only say sorry to you, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of life, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you.
Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into cry. I walked downstairs and drove to the Office. When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife, which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me to write the greeting words on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until we are old...
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Ishel out
@ |12:43 PM|